"Doom Regeneration of the Mid-90s Self" by J. Fossenbell

[NIN – Babyland – Front 242]

“Fuck.”  –Amy Blue

“Teen is a four-letter word.”  –Movie tagline 

“Rose McGowan has a Pulp Fiction Uma Thurman-type haircut which looks great on her bored head.”  –Dr. Gore’s Movie Reviews

The Doom Generation kicks off in a red-lit room full of bodies that sweat and ram against each other to “Heresy” by NIN–a 15-year-old girl in Fort Collins, Colorado can hardly contain herself–she’s half-possessed by Amy’s self-possession–Amy’s red lips–Amy’s nice tits and combat boots–she wants her or she wants to be her–she doesn’t know–she doesn’t know.

“A cult classic.....steamy hot, wicked funny.”  -Clint Morris, Moviehole

Amy smokes and swears–Amy likes retro clothing and black–Amy likes to fuck–Amy is a bitch–an enigma–the mystery is what makes her. A 15-year-old girl in Fort Collins, Colorado smokes and swears–likes retro clothing and all things black–hasn’t fucked yet but thinks she likes making out hard–isn’t a bitch–just a brat.

“Oh my God. If i don't find my skull lighter, I'll, like, slit my wrists.”  -Amy

“I fucking love this movie.”  –JF, age 15

“Like the generation it chronicles, Doom offers no apologies. It's unsafe, unnerving and primed to explode.”  –Peter Travers, Rolling Stone

Amy Blue is shameless in a way that makes you think there is no other way to be. She fucks when and whom she wants, and the two men accept this because she is hot and they are all attracted to each other–a 15-year-old girl decides she will be like this–she fails.

“As a stylish black comedy, it is impressively uncompromising and should be applauded.”  –Joyce Dundas, Empire Magazine

“A note to Gregg: grow up. Really. Move out of your parent's basement, read something other than Salinger, and get a day job.”  –Liz Brown, Jam!Movies

Jordan White is a sweet doofus–Jordan is Keanu Reeves–“I feel like a gerbil being smothered in Richard Gere's butthole.”–Jordan is the only one who asks bigger questions about life–"I love you can mean a lot of things...like you'll do 'till someone better comes along, or I can't describe how I really feel but I know that I'm supposed to say this, or Shut up, I'm watching TV."–Jordan

“I'm worried about catching AIDS.”  –Jordan 

“But we're both virgins.” –Amy 

What?

Xavier Red is one handsome motherfucker–he fighting a band of goons at the drive-in–the band of goons is Skinny Puppy–Nivek Ogre whips a massive chain at him–cEvin Key rolls off the hood of Amy’s car–he breaks his arm in real life–in the movie he is stabbed or sliced by X–X jumps in the car with blood on his face–Amy and Jordan are sitting in their underwear–talking and smoking–casual as all fuck–conflict ensues.

“You fuckin’ furry tuna taco.”  –Xavier Red

“Eat my fuck.”  –Amy

[ MC 900 Ft. Jesus – Meat Beat Manifesto – God Lives Underwater] 

Scene: The generically Asian-looking but supposedly Korean clerk demands the money–Shoplifters will be executed, it says on the wall–Amy Blue and Jordan White say they’ve forgotten it in the car–the Asian clerk pulls out a shotgun and cocks it–X appears out of nowhere and jumps on the guy.

“Six dollars and sixty-six cents, please.”

The clerk’s wife runs at them with a machete–she makes sounds of alarm and swings her machete–she is wearing a conical hat–this seems okay because she is Margaret Cho.

The Korean clerk’s head flies in a slow arc through the fluorescent-lit Quickie Mart–the head lands on the hot dog bar–the eyes behind wire-rimmed glasses pop open–the mouth opens and spews a thick, squash-colored paste–the mouth moans and babbles–the eyes roll–the wife gapes.

“Basically, the story's about these three kids who blow some gook's head off and then decide to go on a murderous fuck-spree. It sounds like it should be an okay movie; too bad everything about it is retarded, annoying, and sucks. The only redeeming quality is the main chick- she is one quality piece of skirt steak … this might be the worst movie with a great pair of tits in it ever made.” -Video Picks for Perverts, The World of Mr. Satanism

[Slowdive – Coil – Curve] 

Set:  The hotel room is all red–the walls–the bedspread–the floor–red red red.

Amy is fed up with the world–everything sucks and is boring–even sex–except sex–even drugs–Rose McGowan really does have a great pair of tits.

“Life is lonely, boring, and dumb.” –Amy Blue “We get patented Alicia Silverstone talk that the actors try to pull off as genuine language, but it merely seems like they are haywired Teddy Ruxpins that are programmed to say 'Whatever' when they bump into a wall, human body, etc.”  –Justin, Mutant Reviewers from Hell

A 17-year-old tries to imitate Amy’s ennui, her solipsism–she tries to be demanding in bed–she tries to feel this entitlement–she doesn’t really know how to do it–thank God for movies like this to show her how–someone has failed her and it wasn’t her parents.

“For the terminally hip and/or terminally adolescent.”  -TV Guide’s Movie Guide 

“This movie is fucking hilarious.”  -JF, age 17

Deleted scene:  Xavier jacks off watching Amy and Jordan fuck in the bathtub–they come in the bathtub–he comes in his hand–he licks the cum off his hand.

Death ensues–sex ensues–is it fucked up that I’m turned on right now?–Exactly.

“My mom used to be a heroin addict, and now she's a Scientologist.” –Amy

Everyone thinks Amy is someone else–wonder if she really did screw all these people–the devil appears in many forms–so does a woman.

Theory: Amy is human girl torn between good and evil–Jordan is good–X is evil–White is good–Red is evil–Red is the devil–White is the angel–both the angel and the devil want to fuck the human girl Blue–want to fuck her blue–she must choose–she wants to fuck them both at the same time–this is what it means to be a human girl with two shoulders to sit on–to be a human girl with two holes.  In the end good loses–she and the devil are left.

“Sunshine? Is that you?”

[Porno For Pyros–The Wolfgang Press–Love & Rockets]

“That’ll be $6.66.”  –Perry Farrell as Stop ’n’ Go clerk

“Pray For Your Lost Soul” –sign at Stop ’n’ Go 

Set: The hotel room is black and white checkerboard–the walls– the bedspread–the floor–even the towels–black and white and white and black and squares squares squares.

“I hope we die simultaneously, like in a nuclear bomb blast or something.” –Jordan 

“That’s so romantic.” –Amy

Deleted scene: X jacks off over Amy and Jordan while they sleep.

“Why the hell would you have Jesus tattooed on your dick?" –Amy  

"So people, when I'm boning them, can say I've got Jesus inside me." –Xavier 

“Would you kindly stop babbling and fuck me already?”  –Amy to Xavier

Deleted scene: Jordan jacks off while watching through the window as Amy and X climax.

Lesson: Relax–whatever’s whatever, you know?

“The [press kit’s] notion that the threesome is 'too pure for this world,' which presumably gives them the right to kill store owners and other bystanders, is in its classic form pure fascist twaddle about the ubermensch or superman, whose moral superiority gives him the right to murder.”  –Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun Times

Deleted scene: X convinces Amy to stick her finger up his ass–she licks it.

“Kitten? Is that you? It’s me!”

[Aphex Twin–Extra Fancy–Cocteau Twins]

Lesson: Johnathon Shaech and James Duval make lovely bedfellows.

“Cool.  I didn’t know punk queer soft-core existed.” –JF, age 15 

“A Heterosexual Movie by Gregg Araki.” –Movie subtitle 

“This is also a homosexual movie posing as heterosexual…. [T]he climax features even more repulsive homophobic nazis that chop off a guy's genitals and this was supposed to be a comedy.”  –Zev Toledano, The Worldwide Celluloid Massacre

Deleted scene: Amy convinces Jordan to let her stick her finger up his ass–tells him he’ll love it.

Theory: Xavier is a human man torn between good and evil–Jordan is good–Amy is evil–White is good–Blue is evil–he is the stranger and they are both strangers–he wants to fuck them both–he murders people because of his bad upbringing–he fucks the devil and wants the angel too–eventually he gets his wish and they all do it together. In the end evil wins out–he and the devil are left.

“Sniff my finger. Sniff my finger 'n' tell me it doesn't smell like her sweet juicy snatch.”  –Xavier and my ex-boyfriend–someone has failed me and it wasn’t my parents.

“That’s not funny.”  –JF, age 32  

“So is The Doom Generation supposed to be a cheeky comedy that just fails miserably or is it supposed to be a serious look at the tangled web we weave when at first we practice to explore our sexuality while simultaneously killing bystanders indiscriminately?”  –Clare, Mutant Reviewers from Hell

This is not a chick flick–is it–maybe this is a cock flick–maybe this is a bitch flick.

“Fuck that.” –JF, age 15

“Girls have no sense of adventure.”  –Xavier and my ex-boyfriend

“Guilt is for married, old people.”  –Xavier

Lesson: Punks don’t have healthy sexual relationships. If they do, they’re lame–they’re posers.

“The Rapture is Coming” –sign on the highway

Scene: Blue, White and Red stand over a bleeding dog in the road–they are in the middle of nowhere–Amy has just accidentally hit the dog with her boat of a car–the dog is some kind of spaniel–it whines in pain–Amy and Jordan are distressed–visibly and audibly distressed–“Do something,” she pleads–X does something–with his knife he bends down and does something off camera–the dog cries out–Amy winces and turns her head into Jordan’s shoulder–something has been done and is done–“Life is so stupid,” says Amy–she can’t stand a dead dog–but doesn’t mind dead Koreans and assholes.

“Ever feel like reality is more twisted than dreams?”  -Jordan

Theory: No one is human–or angel–or devil–this is a story of nothing against nothing–less than that–a story of cock against cock against pussy–a story of sex against the world–the world always winning.

“Bambi? Is that you?”

[Lush–Medicine –BiGod 20–Ride–Belly]

Scene: The three find a random barn and use it to have a threesome.

“I'd step on a thumbtack before watching it again.” –Scott Weinberg, eFilmCritic.com

Amy’s clear plastic coat is bad-ass–when she gets up to go pee she puts it on over nothing–she is so sexy–a 15-year-old girl wishes she looked like that.

Deleted scene: The neo-Nazi leader George rapes Amy with a statue of the Virgin Mary on top of the American flag–“Part them succulent meat curtains, darling, and get ready for the religious experience of your life!”–

A 15-year-old girl in Colorado feels really weird–she hides it from her older friends–her older friends are laughing–she laughs too–“That’s fucked up, yo.”–someone has failed her and it wasn’t her parents.

Deleted scene: The other two neo-Nazis shove Jordan’s amputated penis down Xavier’s throat.

Zardoz sez: "The penis is evil."  - - - - - - - - - - - - - - “And the shotgun is good.”  –rageofkyubii

Theory: Either way the cock of the angel is lost–the angel has lost his ability to breed–the angel will die the last of his kind.

Deleted scene:  Amy picks up the pruning shears and stabs them into George’s hand–and gouges out George the Nazi rapist’s eyes–he screams–he bleeds–bleeds more–screams more–Amy-as-girl-woman is vindicated–justice is–

Scene: Blue and Red leave White to die.

Theory: Either way we are all fucked and the good one dies.

For more than a decade a girl has bad dreams about the Virgin Mary.

“Self-consciously strives for transgressive nihilism without ever recognizing the sheer absurdity of its every component.” –Nick Schager, Lessons of Darkness

Lesson:  Becoming a victim of sexual violence is the only redemption for a woman who uses both sex and violence to her advantage–what is this telling us–if she wasn’t a victim she’d be nothing–and there’s nothing left to do after rape and murder but look beautiful as before and eat snackfood.

“You want a Dorito?”  –Xavier

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J. Fossenbell writes poems and other stuff. Her work has appeared in ILK journal, Everyday Other Things, Cerise Press, Wazee Independent Journal and The Word magazine. She also coedited the anthology Strange Roots: Views of Hanoi (The Gioi Publishers, 2011) and co-translated The Human Field, a collection of poetry by Tran Quang Quy (Vietnam Writers Association Press, 2009). Now she lives in Minneapolis, where she goes to MFA school at the University of Minnesota and is coeditor-in-chief for dislocate magazine.